There's just something creepy to me about getting in line so some stranger can inject God-knows-what into my bloodstream.
The shooters don't know what's in those needles any more than I do, and they get all irritated if you ask them for ID, a resume and several letters of recommendation.
You know you don't want somebody who's miffed at you sticking a needle into you.
"Oh yeah, we got a special serum for guys like you. Special needle, too." No thanks.
I have to say if I were in charge of the flu shot program (and don't think I haven't thought about pursuing that), I'd add something in there to put people in a little better mood.
A person at whom I honked in traffic last week made a rude gesture instead of apologizing for not getting out of my way.
People are getting grouchy with this recession.
(Oops, sorry, economic guys. The recession ended last year, right? Right.)
For whatever reason, people aren't real cheerful these days. This guy e-mail spammed me a few weeks ago for his political cause, then got upset and called my boss just because I replied with a slightly funny suggestion about where his e-mail should go.
It didn't help me with the boss to remind her that the other fellow started it.
Come to think of it, the boss hasn't been in that great a mood lately either. It could be because guys like that keep calling her to complain about me. I hope he's reading this column and is ashamed of himself.
As for the flu shots, who knows what's in those needles? The government hires some mega-corporation to mix up batches and batches of goo. Scientists, presumably, are paid by the corporation to come up with the cocktail.
Are any of them pranksters? Would the government or the mega-corporation tell us if they were? What kind of background checks do they do on these people?
Scarier thought: Is the mega-corporation the lowest bidder?
Before she went to get her shot, I e-mailed my boss links to Web sites that speculate about what might really be in flu shots: microscopic robots.
I figured it would help her to make a more informed decision.
She looked and laughed.
"Do you really believe all this stuff?" I didn't have an answer.
I'm not saying the government uses flu shots to inject nano robots into your body so you can be tracked by satellite.
I'm just saying that if I were them, that's how I would do it.
Ken York's column appears in The Daily Record, Lebanon, Mo. It is reprinted here with permission.
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